relationships

Spending on a wedding gift? ‘You don't need to break the bank to show your love and support,' says founder of Her First 100k

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Being in a bridal party is a notoriously expensive assignment. And many of the costs happen months before the actual nuptials.

Not including a present, bridesmaids spend, on average, more than $1,600 being in a wedding, according to 2024 data from The Knot. This includes paying for a bachelorette party, bridesmaids dress, and engagement party gift.

After enduring this cornucopia of expenses, the expectation to also purchase the newlyweds a wedding present seems excessive to me. Especially if the couple is anticipating a gift of the same or similar value to those of guests who weren't in the bridal party.

"Weddings will always cost people more money than they originally thought," says Jen Glantz, founder of Bridesmaid for Hire.

But that doesn't mean you have to spend a ton on a wedding present, she says. In fact, you shouldn't deviate from your budget at all.

"Don't over-extend yourself to celebrate people when they are getting married," she says.

'You don't need to break the bank to show love and support'

There are ways to show your affection for the couple without buying an expensive gift, says Tori Dunlap, founder of Her First 100K and author of New York Times bestseller "Financial Feminist."

"You don't need to break the bank to show your love and support," she says. "A thoughtful card, a sentimental gift, or even your presence at the wedding can be just as meaningful."

You can also ask others in the bridal party if they'd like to chip in to purchase a larger item from the wedding registry.

If you feel like the couple might take it personally that you aren't spending as much on a gift, have a talk with them about your budget.

"Always prioritize your financial health, and the couple will surely understand and appreciate your gesture, no matter the cost," Dunlap says.

Glantz agrees that the purpose of a present is to celebrate the union, and you don't need to be fiscally irresponsible to accomplish that.

"When you're in a bridal party, before day one of the role you should set a budget and stick to it," she says. "That should include all the pre-wedding events and that budget shouldn't be what anyone else tells you."

While I'm sure newlyweds would love if you bought them the $300 Le Creuset Dutch oven on their registry, if they are reasonable, they'll be just as happy with something less pricey.

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